How to shift behavioral outbursts in kids

There are many parents who have to deal with behavioral outbursts in their young kids. It is a very difficult situation that requires the parents reactions to shift as well.

I know how difficult it is to have to seem as though you're compromising with a child that should know better than to have a behavioral outbursts. I am a mother of 5 children and have had my share of behavioral outbursts to write a book with. It will be as if I was writing a fictional story, but it is 100% true.

When you are faced with this unfortunate behavior you can do a number of things depending upon the behavioral outburst. Yes there are a few categories to choose from. But know that there are practical ways to shift the behavioral outbursts.

1. Zero Tolerance: For example, hitting, spitting, biting, foul language, seat belts, etc.

2. Compromise and Toleration: For example, completing homework, chores, respectfulness, sharing, image, etc.

3. Negotiation: For example, eating, what to wear, tidying room, etc.

In the first category we see that most of the examples are behavioral outbursts that deal with the treatment of others. These examples and countless others in this category is to be dealt with firmly. All of theses outbursts are to be addressed and serve as an opportunity to build skills that will help shift these behavioral outbursts.

The next category serves as a diplomatic way of handling behaviors that can be dealt with justly taking away emotional instability. It is always a great skill building opportunity when these types of outbursts present themselves, whether by expectation or surprise. This is where the kids will have to come with their best negotiation skills when wanting to compromise a direct rule. Use this time to also talk about the first category "Zero Tolerance" while you have them in a state of negotiation.

The third category is more of a "It's My Choice" type of outbursts, yet still require your undivided attention. This is where you can really provide alternatives and help them with basic organizational skills that will carry on into their adulthood.

I am a fan of the second category, I guess because of my Law Enforcement background. My kids enjoyed the many court sessions we had to help them learn proper negotiation skills. This was a great way of showing that I appreciated their opinions and therefore was able to compromise with them in such a way that they were able to make rules for themselves. It was such a wonderful time. I miss those days.

Anyway, whether it's Zero Tolerance, Compromise, Toleration or Negotiation you must have a strategic plan of how you're going to address the behavioral outbursts by having a shift method in place.